Here is another practice that many people report finding quite effective: the I NOTICE practice. The idea is to sit comfortably in an accepting pose, palms open upwards, hands resting on your knees. You start with noticing your breath, and then, scanning slowly from toes to head, you try to notice every sensation, saying to yourself: “I notice…”
Examples: the touch of my feet on the floor; the tightness in my legs; the feel of my sweater on my back; the itch on my cheek.
Now try to withhold judgment for each sensation you notice, perhaps even try to avoid relaxing a tightness or scratching an itch you are noticing. Observe, describe, accept. If you have a thought about the sensation (“my back hurts and I am not sitting comfortably”), notice that this is a thought, and describe it as well.
Practicing this proves very helpful in moments of crises with our relatives, as we develop the skills to notice — in this case the other person (i.e. we learn to say to ourselves: I notice how angry she sounds) without necessarily taking immediate action in response.